How to build self confidence is something many people attempt to figure out especially since we hear constantly how important it is to our success in life. So, we know we need it but how to get it are two totally different things. And many people don’t take the best path for getting to where they want to go.
Whether it’s the right thing to do or not, when trying to figure out how to build self confidence, we often consult other people’s beliefs about us in order for us to form our own opinion of ourselves. We really think this is the place we need to start. I mean after all if other people don’t like who we are how can we like ourselves, seems to be the popular thinking.
Seeking other people’s opinion isn’t in and of itself a bad thing to do but it does become harmful when our feeling about ourselves comes solely from what others think of us. Believing that we can’t like ourselves just because there are other people who don’t like us is an extremely harmful concept to follow.
We are definitely social creatures and we can’t live in a vacuum but we also can’t let every person’s changing opinions dictate whether we have good feelings about ourself or bad. If you’re trying to figure out how to build self confidence this method will surely only take you further and further away from your goal.
This is even more harmful to our sense of self when the people we are relying on to provide this information and set of opinions about us really don’t have our best interest in mind. And not everyone we interact with on a daily basis have the purest of intentions for us even if they say they do. Surprise, surprise!
The point I’m making here is that you need to be a bit more conscious of what you listen to and what you don’t listen to when it comes to other people’s opinions of you. Use the information you receive as a form of self improvement.
In other words take a look at what they have to say and examine what you can use from it to make improvements in yourself. Don’t use it to put yourself down and become even more critical of yourself. And remember, you can’t please all of the people all of the time. Or as they say, take what you need and leave the rest.
When trying to figure out how to build self confidence, you need to first begin by being happy with yourself and liking yourself and improvements will come about over time. Dislike yourself and put yourself down and things in your life will only get worse not better. The choice is up to you.
We all know people who seem to have been born with a confidence that let them face the world. They walk smart and they talk eloquently and they seem to have the conviction that they can do anything. And we, the audience look at them with complete awe and envy and say, “Why can’t I be like one of them?”
The truth is…
They are good at projecting themselves outward for all to see. In fact that is exactly their intention, to get you to believe they are what they say they are. And you really can be just like them, who ever said you can’t?
Self-confidence is within each and everyone of us. It just needs to be cultivated and developed. But if you really want to know how to build self confidence than you must believe in yourself first just like those people you admire for their own confidence.
Self-confidence is a trait we all have to learn and we all have an equal chance to learn it. It isn’t stamped into our genetic make-up that one of us must have low self-confidence while another one of us is blessed with lots of confidence. It’s our choice to go after what we want or stay stuck in negativity. So, if you say you truly want to know how to build self confidence than go for it.
In the beginning, just like anything new that you work toward there will be bumps along the way and points of uncertainty. Anything worth having takes work and perseverance. You might even find yourself retreating to the comfort of the old ways but stick with it and you to will become like those that you admire.
“Act As If”
In fact here is another helpful suggestion for how to build self confidence. Do what we call, “Act as if.” Suppose for the moment that you are already the confident person you are and constantly give yourself and the world this impression. Act as if your confident, happy and successful.
This process will take time so don’t expect that you’ll grow confident overnight. You will even have to use much of your will power and do some positive talking with yourself to be able to get through the first preparation phase, which by the way is the most difficult stage towards building self confidence. /P>
You will then begin to make other people believe that you are the confident person you are projecting and in time, you will learn to make yourself believe that you truly are positive with yourself. It’s like a trick, yes. This habit, after all, does the “trick” because “acting as if” can indeed become reality.